Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy, Happy...



Times have changed, but the wish remains the same.... be safe, be healthy and be happy... Much happiness for a great 2009!

Beth

Friday, December 26, 2008

Wii love you...

Ok, I am embarrassed to say... I love the dang Wii!! so far I have the highest score in my family for bowling!! Not that I am tracking it or keeping score I am just saying..
Beth

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Child is Born...


Remembering the true meaning of Christmas.... the birth of our Saviour Jesus Christ. I hope you all have a healthy, happy and safe Christmas. Many Blessings for a wonderful 2009!
Beth

Saturday, December 20, 2008

A Flat Screen Nightmare...

Why is it that whenever we attempt to do something so simple like hang a TV on a Wall we have massive problems>!
Case in point, hubby treated himself to a 42" Flat Screen TV for Anniversary/Christmas Combo gift, ok, yeah that is EXACTLY what I wanted. Hell I don't care, he does nothing for himself so in hindsight I was pleased. However, we currently do NOT have a TV in our Living Room because it is was the only clean room in our home, not anymore.
Hubby ordered the TV from Amazon . Hubby and E his friend, attempted to mount the TV after 57 yes 57 holes in the walls looking for a STUD!, I couldn't take it so I packed up my middle daughter went to the beach, shopped, had dinner with friends and had a glorious weekend. Came home and WHAT, the TV is not on the wall, why you ask, oh well the WHOLE TV screen is Shattered as in the tube. Holy Shit Batman! So hubby calls Amazon and Voila New TV!
It is currently on the wall, crooked, I am pissed, he says it is fine and he isn't changing it. well, we will see about that. Anyway,there is a point, why is my WHOLE house looking like the Garage from SANFORD and SON just from mounting one freakin TV!!!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Our Office Re-Gift Party

It was so much more fun then it sounds. I, as many of you know by now, work for a mortgage Company. Well, the economy has been in a little rut so I thought lets have a Re-Gift party!You know give one of your co-workers a stanky old gift you didn't like! Old oven mitts, tea flavored candy, Nascar ornaments etc...

Y'allwehad blast, and for 15 short minutes we forgot about the stupid economy and money and realized that being together and enjoying one another is the best gift of all. I mean seriously, my office cronies make anything fun.by the way, I ended up with dang tea flavored candy, oh well. GOOD TIMES, GOOD TIMES...

Merry Christmas,
Beth

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Another package was at my door...

Precious Sara sent me the most adorable cake stand, green and white striped with red polka dots! Love it.. Coasters and christmas notepads and paper. This has been so much fun. Thanks to Clemsongirlandtthecoach and preppypinkcrocoodile for organizing. I want to do another.. Just Kidding I am shopped out and pocket poor, I need to lock some more loans.. Rates are low, low low, so if you live in SC call me to Refinance and skip that january payment and save a few hundred dollars on that mortgage payment.

TTFN, Beth

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

14 Blissful years and the SWAP!(not partners) LOL!

Ok, I have been such a slacker lately.. Agent Open Houses, Closings(yeah), Christmas shopping and the usual to and fro Mother taxi duties I have forgotten to tell you all about the SWAP!
I received a wonderful package from Claraspinkcupcakes.blogspot.com! Williams-Sonoma peppermint soap, darling waffle weave dish towels with pink snowflakes, peppermints and the cutest ornament I believe she made.. Thanks CUPCAKE!! I have another one on its way and I hate to admit it, but I love this SWAP thing.. Getting something in the mail for me is so much fun and the surprise that awaits you, well, it is darn right exciting!!
Well, I have a LOT to do today, it is my 14th Wedding Anniversary and Hubby is going to a concert with his brother, oh well, he made it right by giving me a bottle of Allure Sensuelle by Chanel!!

TTFN, Beth

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Where have I been...

I have been a Nurse since the Friday after Thanksgiving! Two youngest girls Strep throat and yucky colds and Drumroll please, one whiney Pain in the ASS husband with a cold. Now ladies before you go thinking I am an insensitive Biotch where he is concerned, let me tell you, why is it when they are sick the WORLD STOPS!!

I'm just saying... Beth

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Time to give thanks...

So far I have made, chocolate chip pecan pie, pecan pie, sweet potato souffle, stuffing, and dinner for the family, leftovers! A gal I worked with suggested that I need to drink a glass of wine to relax while I attempt these feats, and much to my surprise, it did indeed take the edge off. Thanks KATHY! Now I am on glass numero 3 as I blog..
Blessings to all, be safe, be healthy, and most importantly be HAPPY!
Oh a note to my SWAP partners; packages are being sent out Friday!! Preppy your tumbler is on its way as well. NYC looked like so much fun!

Fondly, Beth

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

I've Been Tagged!!!

Where is your cell phone? on my desk
Where is your significant other? work, better be
Your hair color? blonde
Your mother? heaven
Your father? heaven
Your favorite thing? used to be coffee but now DECAF!
Your dream last night? none
Your dream/goal? raise secure daughters
The room you’re in? office
Your hobby? blogging
Your fear? dying young
Where do you want to be in 6 years? New Home
Where were you last night? where wasn't I
What you’re not? boring
One of your wish-list items? Coco Chanel Autobiography
Where you grew up? Beach
Last thing you did? went to see the NUTCRACKER with middle daughter
What are you wearing? black pants, green cable knit sweater ,black flats and triple strand of pearls
Your TV? offYour pet? mutt Butterbean
Your computer? Acer Laptop
Your mood? happy
Missing someone? my sister
Your car? filthy
Something you’re not wearing? socks
Favorite store? Target
Your summer? Beach SC
Love someone? absolutely
Your favorite color? blue
When is the last time you laughed? 5 minutes ago
Last time you cried? everyday

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Is it just me or...


Do I look like Paula Deen and my husband like her son Jamie? I mean DANG! And who told me this shade of lip color looked good on me? They Lied! And what about that loverly CHIN ROLL!
I think I need a muted taupe or light pink instead of this whorish red. Anr to think I thought I looked good! LOL! We had fun as always...

Monday, November 17, 2008

It's Official...



My Little girl is growing up and I don't like it one bit.. I am sad in fact. She came to me yesterday and said " Mommy, I think I have a loose tooth"! I immediately thought she was telling me a little fib, because she wants to be like her sisters, but sure enough upon further review, she does INDEED have a loose tooth. I called my husband and said look her tooth is loose and started bawling, WTH! I didn't react like this when the other 2 girls lost their teeth, why now? Because she is it, the end, my last baby and I was sad. I scooped her up, kissed her face and was so excited for her and yet so sad for me..

Signed,

Beth

Thursday, November 13, 2008

and the WINNER is.....

All Things Southern & Preppy aka Preppy 101


Whoo Hoo!! You won!! Now all you have to do is send me your Monogramm or name, favorite colors and VOILA a NEW tumbler is on it's way to your Preppy little home!!

I love a contest and THANK YOU to all who entered, there will be more to come..

Beth

Monday, November 10, 2008

Superior Scribbler Award, Oh My!


Thanks to Preppy 101 aka ALL things Southern and preppy she deems me a serious Scribbler, thank You, I am touched.
I tag the following
Southern Yankee
Old Faithful
Caffeine Court
3 Peanuts
Here are the rules
1. Post it on your Blog
2. Link it back to me!
3. link original post here
4. Pass the award to 4 deserving bloggers
5. post the rules!

See wasn't that easy,
Beth

Sunday, November 9, 2008

How bout them GAMECOCKS!!!

Hubby and I had fun! I did NOT get drunk, I was on my ladylike behavior, because I am going to the Doctor tomorrow and I don't need my Liver Enzymes coming into question! LOL!
I went to take a nap at 6:30pm, woke up at 9:00pm and fell back asleep at 10:00pm, woke up at 8:00am. WTH! A night away from the kiddies and I choose to sleep.. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Oh well, as my late mother Gertie would have said "you must have needed the sleep"! I did! I feel great, so I am rewarding myself with lunch with my BFF and some new Tennis wear for our Clubs annual tournament which I am participating in for the first time!! Wish me luck..
Beth

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Homecoming, and I don't mean at the Church!


USC vs. Arkansas
1:00pm Williams-Brice Stadium Columbia, SC
Hubby and me alone for, oh I don't know, a whole day!
PRICELESS!
2cases of beer CHECK
1 bottle FIREFLY Check
3 diet Cokes CHECK ride home beverage
some water, just to look cool CHECK
Tailgating Food CHECK
Vacuumed and washed car CHECK
if you will be there come find me... parked in front of the ZONE Escalator red shirt and triple strand of Pearls.. I might even share my FIREFLY!!
GO GAMECOCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, November 6, 2008

GIVEAWAY! YEAH!

Please leave a comment about my BLOG and you will be entered to win this adorable monogrammed tumbler! You get to choose your colors and monogram... Enter until Wednesday November 12,2008! I can't wait to see who wins..

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Stylist needed at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue ASAP!!

What in the hell was Michelle Obama wearing? The girls looked cute, but Michelle: Beyonce and the House of Derion need to scratched off the list. I mean, dang, she is tall, thin, do I hear DIOR, YSL, Lauren, shit even Ann Taylor...

On another note, I thought Obama's speech was beautifully said and John McCain could not have been more of a gentlemen, a true patriot!! Let's us move forward, pray for a healthy, peaceful and prosperous nation and for the love of Pete a STYLIST for our new First Lady!

God Bless America,
Beth

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

May the BEST MAN win!!

I hope it truly is the BEST man. Good or bad we are about to see history made. I, as most of you know, live in SC, and I am sure, most of you know, we are a very CONSERVATIVE state, however, after looking at the ABSENTEE line for weeks now, I don't think it will happen this year.. I honestly hope whomever wins this most important race in a time where our Country is suffering, both Morally and Fiscally, we the people, will conduct ourselves like ladies and gentlemen and not go crazy, because quite frankly, I think we may have some riots... Am I crazy for thinking this? Let me know what y'all think.

Seriously speaking,
Beth

Saturday, November 1, 2008

A Pumpkin, A Devil and A Rat!

They had a great night. Is it me or does the DEVIL look like A PLAYBOY BUNNY!

Gamecocks VS. Vols! Go Gamecocks!! You just never know with this team, and poor Tennessee they have seen better days, but they will get it together. I know I am a HUGE Gamecock fan but I truly hope DABO and CLEMSON pull out a stunning win against Boston College day! Good Gosh, I want everyone to be happy I am starting to sound like a Democrat!! Just kidding people... I don't want to step on any toes, damn there I go again!! May the best team win!!

Beth

Friday, October 31, 2008

Out of the mouth of BABES!

Ok, I am helping my 5 year old get her favorite TEAM (USC), outfit on this morning, with the TV News on and she looks up at the TV and says...

Gertie: "Isn't that BRACK OBAMA"?

me: "good job, yes that is, he is running for President"!
Gertie: "OOH! He looks SCARY"! I'm going for McCAIN"!
me: "really"! "you think he looks SCARY"!
Gertie: "YUP, like a DEBIL"!

I swear on the bible I almost fell out!!
I wonder why she thinks that, weird huh!

Happy Halloween and BE SAFE,
Beth

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

I'm sorry, but this is funny!!!!



Enough said,
Happy Halloween,
Beth

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Let's just say mine didn't look like this...



So we get invited to a friends house for a "PUMPKIN PARTY! sounds like fun huh? well, it was, but damn I have three kids and I had to gut 3 pumpkins because you all don't think my three little PUMPKINS were actually going to touch PUMPKIN goo! Quite frankly, I didn't think I could either. You see I am ashamed to admit it, but that was my first time carving pumpkins. You see I don't like getting "dirty" either. I have a mouth like a sailor but I am as prissy as Jackie O!! So, my oldest bagged hers for Daddy's precision, he can carve a Pumpkin like Van Gogh, but my 2 youngest were quite pleased with my triangle eyes and nose and half mooned mouth! Let's just say it didn't look like the picture above.

Happy Halloween,
Beth

Friday, October 24, 2008

Please tell me why!!!

Why do I always say YES!!???

1. I have no backbone
2. I am a pleaser
3. I am plain stupid
4. all of the above

You got it.. 4: all of the above

I am up to my Hiney in Cupcakes, volunteering to cover not one, but two shifts for our school's annual FREAKY FRIDAY Halloween Bash (it is fun)tonight, making Agent Open House Flyers for an Agent Open house Saturday(ok I will get loans, maybe, for this) and I had to bring in enough POPCORN for my 5K's writing Workshop. Enough! Enough! Stop the madness. Help Me, I need advice to help me say no..

Signed,
I don't know all the answers where this is concerned,
Beth

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Ok, so she ain't going to HARVARD...

Yesterday was parent teacher conference for my Kindergartner, Emerson, who we fondly call Gertie!

Ok, this what went down. I walk in and Mrs. Teacher is grinning from ear to ear!! good sign right, yes, kinda, here is our said conversation...

Mrs. T: " let me start by saying that face, OMG! I love her and those eyes. I could take her picture all day long.. She is a fun little girl, she loves to be outside and kick the ball, she's not your Tea Party type of girl, but she can do that too, if she needs to, I just LOVE HER!

What I am thinking: " who in the hell is she talking about and does she know I am Emerson's mommy?

What I say: She CAN be a sweetheart and of course I think she is beautiful.

Mrs. T: Well, she gets along with everyone and is very tender hearted and caring, and is always helping her Table Partner out with Opening items(he has some Motor skill problems) very subtly without drawing attention to herself or said child.

What I am thinking: Seriously who in the hell is she talking about.

What I say: Oh that is so sweet, because let me tell you, she gives me a run for my money.

Mrs. T: speaking of Money, we accessed her skills and she is a hard worker, knows her letters, writes her name, blah, blah, blah. Well, we went over money value and I placed a nickel down and asked Emerson "how much is that worth"? (this really needs a visual), and she leaned in real close and said 1965. I have never had that happen in all my years of teaching, it was the cutest thing. HAHAHA!!

What I think: Dumb ass, just kidding, it was pretty funny and clever I think.

What I say: Well, sooner or later she will learn the value of a dollar or said nickel, and knowledge and the love of books will soon be an interest for my youngest little girl, but to me honestly, to know that I have a kind child that cares about others, well that is about the finest compliment one can receive. My heart was full.

SO Gertie, this one's for you, thank you for being a kind child. Oh you are probably wondering why we call her Gertie.

Gertie was my late Mother's name, a surly, spirited woman who had the kindest heart of all...

Sunday, October 19, 2008

What a WEEK!

As most of you know by now, I am a Loan Officer for a Mortgage Company and let's just say things are stressful for the mortgage business right now!! It is still a good time to buy a home GEEZ, our parents bought houses when the rates were 16% people, so I don't think 6.5% is bad at all. So with that said, Go to an OPEN HOUSE today in South Carolina anywhere and CALL ME, I will get you a wonderful rate and great service for your home loan purchase, and if you close in November by golly you won't have a payment until January so you will have plenty of LOOT for all of your Christmas purchases! See wasn't that easy!!

Well, both the Gamecocks, my team and Clemson whoevers team LOST, sad day for the State of SC!

I am trying to get going for the day and take my rugrats shopping for some warm clothing. My middle daughter has grown 4 inches since last year and all of her pants are floods. Speaking of MOO, that's her nickname, the other day I was glancing at her piggies and I noticed her BIG TOES were RED, ouch! So as the concerned Mother that I am, chuckle chuckle, I asked her why her piggies were RED and she said, "because my toes are rubbing the tips of my shoes"! I said" dear God why didn't you say anything". and she said, "because you said you weren't buying another DAMN thing because we are on a Budget" OUCH! Did I really say Damn? Yes, but dang I don't want her feet to bleed. Guess I am buying a pair of Tennis shoes today.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Am I being punished?...

My downstairs Laundry room FLOODED yet again!! After forking over ALOT of money oh I don't know a month ago to my plumber it has flooded again. Same way as before, ran the garbage disposal the same time the washing machine and dishwasher were running, see I roll that way, I am a multi-tasker, apparently my PLUMBING is NOT!! So I called my girlfriend* to BITCH and she said, "call our trash and sewer service provider"! What, huh? they will fix it? Yes, people they will! They were here within the hour and VOILA! fixed and for free! Seems the plumber didn't go far in enough before. Mmm! Uh huh! Needless to say I love my sewer provider and I am going to write them a big fat thank you letter.

I am going to The SC State Fair today, wish me luck.....

* should this be Just Ask Andrea.. I am losing my MOJO for knowing info.. DANG!

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Watch where you are going....

Did I happen to mention I hit a pedestrian the other day? UH! Yes, I was pulling out of the Publix shopping center and I looked to my right, then left and eased out when I heard THUMP, THUMP, THUMP and "GD lady watch where you are going!"
What? OMG! I didn't even SEE you I swear, are you ok? Yes, Yes, I am fine go on and put down your Gdamn Cell phone.. I pinky swear I wasn't talking on it, it was in my hand.... because AFTER I pulled out I was going to call someone, but after that fiasco, I almost wet myself, threw up and passed out, so I went back to work, without talking on the phone at all.

Seriously, what a wake up call. I was so scared, that I am very careful about talking out of necessity when in the car..

Did I mention the pedestrian was a gray haired man.. OUCH!!

Monday, October 6, 2008

Award Update...

My husband who was listed as number two on my six favorite things has been edged out by BUTTERBEAN my windowsill eating dog! Why you ask? Hubby went out around 7:30 last night and returned home... let's just say it smelled like coffee and bacon when he got home. Looks like somebody besides BUTTERBEAN will be in the DOGHOUSE.

Signed, Your loving wife xoxo

Sunday, October 5, 2008

These are a few of my favorite things....



Thnak You Jessica aka Southern Yankee! I am so honored to have my very first BLOG Award. I am told I must list my six favorite things... Okie Dokie, here goes.

1. The sweet smiles of my 3 girls

2. My husband, any way, shape, or form, he is a true gentlemen and a wonderful father.

3. Boys. Don't ask me why. I do not have boys but always thought of myself as a BOY MOM! I just love them, what you see is what you get.. NO DRAMA! Unless of course they have a hovering psycho mom that likes to baby them. I like them rough and tough!

4. The fact that my children remember my parents and always talk about them even though they never Knew them, they both died before my girls were born.

5. Thanksgiving Day. My all time favorite day of the YEAR! We have a lot to be thankful for, not to mention all that yummy goodness and aroma floating through the house.

6. My select few good friends who I know will always be there for me and I for them.


Thank You, Jessica

I select

Caffeine Court totally funny and my new BFF on the BLOGroll
Amanda The Family News my Carolina connection
mgbhlh Funny and to the point
Preppy101 Sweet girl
Kara Pink,green and southern I like her style
PearlsandGrace she is so busy with her family but seems to get it all done effortlessly

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Tennis Update..

Well, as much as I hate to admit defeat, I will, I LOST! However, I made a gallant effort! I have been having issues with my back, and quite frankly, I didn't think I could do it, but I did! Do I feel better today? Hell no! But, Hell Yes also! Why do you ask? Because, I exercised! It felt great to breathe in fresh air and move around these old joints of mine. I am a little sore today, but a good sore. One thing I am not is a SORE LOSER, I had fun even in defeat. 6/0 6/0! DANG!

P.S. we did get to deuce several times!

Signed, Yours truly,

FIT BARBIE

Monday, September 29, 2008

It's that time again!!!

Please pray for me fellow Bloggers!! Think of Madonna singing "Don't cry for me Argentina"! My first Tennis Match tomorrow night, doubles , thank God. Let's just say I haven't hit a ball in oh, 4 months.. I always think I will win. WTH is wrong with me? Why do I think I don't have to practice but I am Serena Freakin Williams on the court. Update tomorrow night. I pinky swear if I win, I will definitely go to Sunday practice, but quite frankly after Saturday football tailgating I am a WHEE bit tired. A girl has her priorities.

Note to Caffeine Court, I promise to practice more and be more serious( for my partners sake) and after the debacle with the HOUSE today and the STOCK Market plunging, my DRUG of choice is XANAX with a VODKA chaser!

CHEERS,
Just ASK BETH

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

You are the what? Really...........

My oldest daughter, who is in 7th grade made the JV Girls High School Tennis team this year. Yeah for her, bad for me. Not really, but her Coach sucks.
According to Webster's dictionary;
COACH(noun) : one who instructs players in the fundamentals of a competitive sport and directs team strategy.

Now this is where the bad for me comes in. We don't need "Debbie Downer "coaching our girls with phrases such as "You Lost?, great we needed that one to win the match"! "You Lost, I figured you would". Nice, that always motivated me when I played Team Sports. I have heard some say well, who else will do it? Well, I know 5 mom's who are great Mothers, Tennis Players and overall nice people I could suggest.

Oh, on a side note COACH, please for the love of Jesus, Mary and Joseph , lose the damn blue sofee's, raggedy T-Shirt and dress like the TEAM!

Signed,
A loving Mother

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Say What?!!

I am a Loan officer with a Mortgage Company and yesterday I was helping a Client decipher his payoff on his current mortgage, confusing to say the least since it totally burned to the ground on Aug 1st, sad, anyway here is said conversation:

Client: Do you think you can help me? I don't know what to do.
Me: I will try but this may be out of my hands and a job for your insurance company.

Client(staring a hole through my head): Anybody ever tell you, you have nice lips?
Me to self: "no he didn't'" and continue to look at said paperwork

Client: "For real you do"!
Me: Not at work they haven't! Thank You

Client: "so can you help me"
Me: This is out of my hands and I wish you the best of luck!

we say our goodbyes, shake hands....

Now, if he said I had a Nice Ass I would have solved that problem!! Just KIDDING!

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

DANG!

After much consideration I removed my POST because quite frankly some ANONYMOUS PSYCHO commented 13 times, the last being 4:26 am this morning, must be the person I was talking about. So I was just saying, it was a figure of speech people! Ease up, simmer down, and move on.. I know I have! Have a Great day!

Friday, September 12, 2008

Does This Make Me Look Fat???

Damn, I guess I am going to have to return my NEW $300.00 black ensemble!

Thursday, September 11, 2008

God Bless America

LET us not forget those who so innocently lost their lives 7 years ago, and those who have lost their lives since, in the name of freedom. May God keep their families, friends, and this nation in the palm of his hand... Let freedom ring!

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I'm Lovin It!!..


After CCD, we are Catholic, and the girls attend this religious education class EVERY Wednesday night for classes. Hell no they don't miss, and YES, they did receive the perfect attendance award last year, because I relish my 1hr 15 minute break at Target or Starbucks!

Ok, to the point! They get a treat for their torture, as they perceive it, so off we went to McDonalds, yes that's right the very same HAUNT we went to before and...

McDonalds: May I take your order?

Me: Well, yes, yes you may. I will take a large Diet Coke(me) and 3 Hot Fudge Sundaes (girly goos)

McDonalds: $4.45 please drive around

Me to Self: I must be on Candid Camera and they saw my car coming around??? HMMM?

McDonalds: $4.45

give her a $5.00 get change and pull up

WHEN, ARE YOU READY????

McDonalds: Hey Sweetie! Do you need a drink holder for these Sundaes Sweetie?

Me: 3 seperate please GOTCHA JUST KIDDING

Me: No thank you!!

McDonalds: Have a great night! Me: You too... SWEETIE!

Now that's what I call service SOUTHERN STYLE

Is It Just Me??

As the Mother of 3 girls i feel like I have free reign to comment on this subject: BITCHINESS!

Ok, first let me tell you my girls are 12, 8, and 5. They are FAR from perfect. Oh, I am not commenting on their BITCHINESS but the BITCHINESS of some of the girls they go to school with.

I am perplexed on a daily basis why girls today are so damn rude and I am going to name a few: no, not the girls, examples of behavior EASE UP!

1. they see you but turn away so they don't have to speak. BITCH!

2. you say hello to them and they act like they don't hear you or your daughter. BITCH!

If you are thinking to yourself, no not my little Suzy, she's just shy. No she's RUDE. Shy is todays word for rude. So parents everywhere Teach your child to Speak when Spoken to.

If my girls act that way and I find out, or observe it, there will be serious consequences, it is simply in the words of BON QUI QUI! RUDE!

Now, usually it is my observation that the girls acting like this have BITCHES for Mothers... I'm just sayin..

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Haven't we Met Before...

Run, Run as fast as can be,
I'm the rude ass fast food girl named BON QUI QUI (YouTube: Bon Qui Qui! hilarious)

Seriously, how many of us has experienced this type of behavior, like WE are bothering someone in these establishments!

Case in point!

McDonalds: May I take yo orduh?

Me: Sure! I would like a McNugget Happy Meal sprite(girl), 2 small fries, and 1 large diet coke(me) and 1 large sweet tea.

McDonalds: blah blah drive thru

Me: Pay and say THANK YOU

pull up

McDonalds: repeats order back

Me: I'm sorry, can I get those fries in 2 seperate bags, they are for my girls.

NOW this is where it gets scary!

Shift Manager standing behind Drive thru Boy: What She Say?

DTB: She say she wants 2 diffrunt bags!

Shift Manager: uh uh! No, hell no and hands me a bag so I CAN DO IT!

Me: WTH! Never mind! before I drive off I must have been in some sort of Catatonic state for a moment because I yelled out YOU LAZY BASTARDS!

what what was that?

Back Seat: "Mommy are you mad"?

Me to Self: OOPS! For a brief moment I forgot they were there, see I told you I was in a CATATONIC STATE!

Monday, September 8, 2008

"Build it and they will come"...

Ok, let me start by saying I absolutely love my husband, ok, I got that out of the way!

About a month ago, my husband, whom I lovingly refer to as "TIGER", (nothing to do with CLEMSON), decided it would be a good idea to GUT the garage and turn it into a MAN CAVE. Come Again, a WHAT? Yes, that was the verbage he used. I think I may have said something like you are a FREAK or WT!, where the hell is all this crap going! Nonetheless, I set him free and lo and behold he created his dream....

Now, this all took place before the first Gamecock game so he could UNVEIL it to all the men in the neighborhood. Y'ALL he worked tirelessly for 2 days to get it JUST RIGHT..

I almost wet myself with glee for the man when he unveiled it, I have never seen him so excited, the man doesn't have a pulse, nothing bothers him, he is a constant. Now the MAN CAVE, that excited him.

The day of the game I looked around,and what did I see, men walking down the street towards our house with coolers full of beer. Women pushing babies in strollers also coming to our house. Children riding scooters and bikes coming to our house.. I looked at "TIGER" and said "did you invite all of these people to your MAN CAVE to watch the game?" Without missing a beat, he looked at me, and I swear to the Lord above he was serious and said..

" BUILD IT AND THEY WILL COME"

Garnet and Black Stripes down both walls
8 ft. garnet and black plaid sofa
refrigerator stocked with beer

a place to call your own... PRICELESS


Saturday, September 6, 2008

IT LOOKS LIKE TEA ,IT TASTES LIKE TEA ,BUT...

DAMN, it sure feels like a hangover tomorrow!! Dang! That Firefly sure goes down easy.... I'm just sayin.. NIGHT NIGHT!

Just Call Me HAZEL!!

Ok, let me start by letting you young bloggers out there know who HAZEL is. HAZEL was a TV Show in the late 60's and ran throughout the 70's( obviously when I watched it). She was a chubby, lovely housekeeper for the Baxter Family, she was not a MAID! I loved her, because not only did she clean, she was a great source of knowledge for the Baxter family, who she lovingly referred to as Mr. B and Mrs. B. Anyway, my point is she was the Housekeeper, not the MOTHER.

I swear I spend every waking moment when I am NOT at work, NOT in the car shuffling the girls to and fro, CLEANING my house! My husband sometimes calls me HAZEL!! Ok the BUCK STOPS HERE! I am getting a complete makeover. He needs to start referring to me as Kitten, Honey, Sweetie, something, but Hazel, really....

Thursday, September 4, 2008

I can't take it!!!!

Well, once again the mighty Gamecocks, and I use that term loosely, disappoint!
Vandy 24
USC 17
Seriously, folks I cannot take it, I am feeling a little bit of ANGINA!! Why do I take this to heart? No pun intended, or was it , I am tipsy! I am 44 for God's sake. The party at my house was fun and I need to partake in a little nighty night, I have one more day of schlepping to and fro and let's not forget the new 8:30-5:00! whatever, it is enough to make me take to the bed.. Oh well....

You want me to do what?

Question? When you work in a business where you are a 100% commissioned employee do you need to be there from 8:30 to 5:00? I think NOT!!
At our Monthly Loan officer meeting to day the president of our company uttered those horrible words! WTH!, this is why I am in this business so Ican have the flexibility to work at the office and from home. My 3 girls have needs, like.. gymnastics, tennis, church and quite frankly I have a need also.. HAPPY HOUR and President, if you are reading, it is between 4:00 and 7:00, which gives me ample time to make sure they are bathed, homework done and I am in one happy mood hence the name!! There you have it.